FancyShmancy Chicken Casserole

Well, I actually cooked dinner again this month and thought I would document the blessed event.

This is a yummy "take" on the boring shmoring typical church pot-luck chicken casserole. I promise this one is different.

Here are the ingredients:


3 cups cooked chicken (bite size)
(clarification....not bite size chickens, but bite size pieces OF chicken. Bite size chickens would be weird....and a little creepy....but now that I think about it, it would save me a lot of time.)
1 cup rice, Can of Cream of Mushroom, Can of Beef Broth, Can of French Onion Soup, 1/2 stick of butter, 1 jar mushrooms, 1 cup milk, 1/4 to 1/2 cup Mayo, Worcestershire, Shredded Cheese

Preheat oven to 325.

If you forgot to buy the jar of mushrooms, you can use your imagination and make a pretend jar.


If you WANT to mess with cooking your own chicken, go right ahead....BUT.....WalMart chickens are only 5 bucks a pop and that's 'almost' as cheap as making it yourself in my book.
By the way, my"book" is called I Don't Like To Touch Raw Dead Chickens So Any Shortcut Is A Good Shortcut.

Besides, I could never in a million years make chicken this juicy. I used only the breast meat of two chickens. If you are brave enough to use the dark meat, too....you could get by with just one bird. Dark meat kinda gives me the heebie jeebies so I go for the extra 5 bucks and just grab another chicken.

Put the cup of rice in the bottom of a 13x9 baking dish

Add the can of Beef Broth, Can of French Onion Soup, and 1/2 stick of butter that you have cut into little pieces.


Then add your pretend mushrooms that you forgot to buy at the grocery store because you are tragically unorganized and incapable of making an actual grocery list so you always forget at least one ingredient. It's the cross I bear.


Cover with foil and bake at 325 for about 50 minutes and get ready to smell the most wonderful smell.


While the rice layer is baking and making your house smell positively DIVINE, put the frozen broccoli in a bowl.

Add the Can of Cream of Mushroom soup.

1 cup of milk.


1/4 to 1/2 cup of May-Oh-NNaise
(Movie reference alert: Extra points if you can name that movie)

A couple shakes of Worcestershire sauce.
I have never learned to say this word...is it:
"War-Chest-tEr-Shire"
"WOOSH-ter-Shire"....
"Woosh"-ter-shear"

Mix all that together and go check on your rice.

If you could smell this, you would kiss me. The Yankee Candle company should make a scent called "Bottom Layer of French Onion Rice from FancyShmancy Chicken Casserole".

Take it out of the oven, increase the oven temperature to 375 and fluff this stuff with a fork.
Fluff, Fluff, Fluff.

After you have fluffed and puffed and blooooooown your house down, spread the chicken stuff on top.

Then, as with all great casserole dishes...

......................all together now

.................... you know what's comin'

....................................here we go, let's all say it on three.

One.............

TWO.......

THREE!

"TOP WITH CHEESE"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (And the crowd goes wild!!!!)


Cover with foil again and pop it back in the 375 oven for 30 minutes, then take the foil off and let the cheese get a little gooeyer and browner for about 10 minutes.

VIOLA! It turns green! (sorry about the weird shade of this picture.....I haven't a clue how to take pictures of food.....but trust me, it looked GOOD.)


Lastly, get a pretty red plate and glop some on there and spend the rest of your meal listening to your family tell you, "It's really good..........if you would just leave out the broccoli next time".

Swine Time

Today, class, we will be learning what it means to "clip" a pig.

Clipping a pig basically means to give it a hair cut...........but in a pig's case, it's a really LOUD hair cut.

You want to clip a pig before a show so he feels all pretty and special like when the Lion on The Wizard of Oz gets all gussied up before he meets the Wizard....or in this situation, the Judge!

First, you are going to need a pig. I prefer the beautiful maroon-ish red-ish breed that is called Duroc. I just love Durocs. I love their Fightin'Texas Aggie maroon color.



Here are Bucky and 8-Ball. These are R's pigs for the San Antonio Livestock show next week.

Step 1: Get squeaky clean.


I use this handy dandy soapy thingy that attaches to the hose.



Get the pig really super soapy all over.........
(Bucky loved this part.......except for when I accidentally squirted it in his ear. You NEVER want to squirt something in a pig's ear because at that point, you become the bath RECEIVER instead of the bath GIVER.)

Make sure you get all the parts nice and soapy.

Then let the soapy stuff sit for a bit and "marinade". While this is taking place, you can talk to your pig about how handsome he looks and how you will give him all the cookies he wants if he walks correctly in the ring and wins you a big fat ribbon. (Or you can just skip the ribbon part and tell him he can have all the cookies he wants no matter what....which is what I do:-)

Then it's time for the final rinse! LOOK at that gorgeous red color....I love it.
Sherwin Williams should make a paint color called "Duroc Red"---I would paint my entire house that color.

Next, you take WD-40 (yes, I said WD-40....the same exact WD-40 that you would use to fix a squeaky door) and squirt it all over the pig's hair. If you want, you can tell the pig it's some fancy Vidal Sassoon mousse/hairspray so he will feel fancy and special.

(I love this picture because I'm quite sure I was the only mom from my neighborhood that morning squirting WD-40 on a pig)

The WD-40 helps protect the blades on the clippers while making it easier to go through the coarse hair.


Then, starting wherever the PIG decides to "let" you start..........you start clipping away running the blades of the clippers against the direction of the hair growth.

Pigs are very much like three year olds............you have to let them think it's "their" idea and things will go much better. You can't really boss a pig around too much............you have to be patient, calm and willing to let things happen on "pig" time. As long as you are willing to do that, you won't get frustrated and want to pull your hair out.

(Pause story: You may be wondering, "Where is R?"........he was in school because we did this on a Friday morning........ R DOES know how to clip a pig.......here are some pics from last year just to prove it!)



These are from March 2008.......these were his pigs for the Houston show last year.

FFA stands not only for "Future Farmers Of America", but also, "Families Feeding Animals"..........it's not JUST a kid project, it's a family project.
Sorry, I just had to get that out of the way because it really bothers some people.

Okay.........now that you believe me...........

Resume current story HERE:

Bucky thinks this whole hair cut was "his" idea...........that's why he's being so sweet.


I really enjoy clipping pigs.......it's very calming for some reason.

If you are lucky, you get a pig like Bucky that will let you do most of the clipping in the wash-pen area without having to put a snare on his nose. I'll show you that a little further down.


Clipping this way takes a little longer because your "target" is moving. (Kinda like giving a toddler a hair cut...............a moving 270 pound "toddler")

Bucky let me do about 80% of his hair cut this way.................but then it came time to do his face, neck, and ears.............that's when things turned a little "hairy".

At this point, you have to "snare" the pig..........which means you take this thin piece of rope and loop it around his top jaw/snout. Once this is on, it's the pigs natural reaction to pull back on it. You then loop the end of it around a bar and the pig will just stand there pulling back on the tension of the rope. It's amazing to see this little bitty rope control a 270 pound animal!



The good part is, pigs will basically stand perfectly still while pulling with all their might on the rope.

The bad part is, it's LOUD. It sounds like you are KILLING the pig. Pigs can be very loud when made to do something they don't want to do! The FFA barn is RIGHT next to a restaurant and when it's pig clipping time, I'm quite sure their requests for bacon cheeseburgers go down dramatically. It's always a treat to see the horrified stares from the outside diners when they hear this: (click for audio)



You can just "feel" all the frantic phone calls to PETA taking place at this moment.
(and this short video clip is NOTHING......I took this once the super loud part was over....sometimes it's so loud, you have to yell to the person standing right next to you.)

Once all that is over................


VIOLA! A clean, clipped pig! This is 8-Ball.


And here is Mr. Bucky...........



Just LOOK at that precious little dimple above his tail.....how cute is THAT?)

And just like a three year old would do....................

digging in the mud after a bath is always a fun thing to do!

A nice bath is a great way to start off a long trailer ride to get ready for next week's show in San Antonio! Good Luck boys!

Let's Talk About Stevie..................

When someone asks me, "What is your favorite Stevie Nicks/Fleetwood Mac song?", it's always a tough one for me to answer. All her (their) songs mean different things to me at different times, so I can't really pick JUST ONE!


"Gypsy" is my favorite at the moment. I love the lyrics.



(For those of you NOT obsessed with all things Stevie, let me explain............basically the song tells the story of how she "followed her gypsy" into music. In interviews, she always talks about what she gave up to do that.........getting married, having children, etc. She always makes it clear that while she doesn't regret following the music/rock-star path, she sometimes wonders what "if"........)

Yes, you just entered "Crazyville" and I am the mayor........but just think about it for a minute.

What "if" we all followed our "gypsy"......where would we be now? How would our lives be different?



Enjoy:-)

So I'm back, to the velvet
underground
Back to the floor, that I love
To a room with some lace
and paper flowers
Back to the gypsy
that I was
To the gypsy...
that I was

And it all comes down to you
Well, you know that it does
Well, lightning strikes,
maybe once, maybe twice
Ah, and it lights up the night
And you see your gypsy
You see your gypsy

To the gypsy that remains
faces freedom with a little fear
I have no fear, I have only love
And if I was a child
And the child was enough
Enough for me to love
Enough to love

She is dancing away from me now
She was just a wish
She was just a wish
And a memory is all
that is left for you now
You see your gypsy
You see your gypsy

Lightning strikes,
maybe once, maybe twice
And it all comes down to you

And it all comes down to you

Lightning strikes,
maybe once, maybe twice
And it all comes down to you

I still see your bright eyes,
bright eyes
And it all comes down to you
I still see your bright eyes,
bright eyes
And it all comes down to you

I still see your bright eyes,
bright eyes
(She was just a wish)
(She was just a wish)
And it all comes down to you

Lightning strikes,
maybe once, maybe twice
And it all comes down to you

Mexican Casserole (G's FAV!)

MY FIRST COOKING BLOG ENTRY!

Warning: My pictures are NOT as beautiful as The Pioneer Woman Cooks, in fact, some of them turned out a little "greenish".
(Ahhhh! Oh, the JOYS of fluorescent lighting! I can't wait to get all new lighting one day in the kitchen so all my food will look like it came from a food magazine photo shoot.)

Okay.....let's get started!
This is G's FAVORITE dinner....he calls it "Mexican Casserole" and I swear he could eat it every night. Here are the ingredients:

1 pound hamburger
1 can Tomato soup
1 cup (ish) your favorite Salsa
2 cups (ish) shredded cheese
9 (ish) corn tortillas
2/3 of Campbells can of milk

(As with all recipes near and dear to my heart.....they begin with some sort of Campbells soup and hamburger meat........can you really go wrong with those two ingredients?)

"Fry you up" some hamburger until no longer pink.

WHILE that is cooking (can anyone say, "Multitask"?????)
Cut the tortillas into little 1" squares.

One cut...................

Two cut, Three cut,.....................

Four.........then you turn and cut some more!
(A short poem by Andrea)

Then put them all in a bowl. (This way, you can play like you have your own show on Food Network and everything is in little bowls so you can easily add ingredients to the recipe while still maintaining eye contact with the zillions of viewers watching)

After you have drained the hamburger, return to skillet and add the tomato soup......

Your favorite salsa

2/3 of the can of milk

All the tortilla pieces. (thanks R for the extra set of hands!)

And 1 cup (ish) of the shredded cheese.

I like to use this piece of stoneware, but any ol' casserole dish will do.


Pour your mixture into the dish, top with remaining cheese and something MAGIC will happen.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.


It will turn GREEN! (not really........Mr. Camera decided to have flash problems so Mr. Fugly Fluorescent Lighting had to fill in.........)

Then cover it with foil.

Bake at 400 for about 20 minutes with the foil on.........


Then take the foil off and cook 10 minutes.


Let it sit and cool for about 5 minutes or so and then top with a "dollop of Daisy"



And if you are a REAL woman.....................top that Daisy with one of these:


We like to eat it with some Tostitos on the side.
FIESTA!